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Those Who Challenge The Sun

by Mariner

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1.
The wax melted and I cursed the sun, this was never about you I ended with my pride and failure, this was never about you. I never noticed the flame had gone, this was never about you. I was appalled and prideful, this was never about you. I've spent years trying to get it right, this was never about you It earned nothing but fervent glares, this was never about you I am aware that I got it wrong, this was never about you the truth was never all that interesting, this was never about you for all those nights I spent alone, this was never about you I am aware that I got it wrong, this was never about you
2.
The Grind 02:00
Winter nights I let it slip through the cracks, and warm my skin with it's fingers. She came and went like the seasons, and was just as fickle. I broke loose, and fell back into the sea. It is the driving force in every word, a hurricane of spirit and a lack thereof. I was alone and I was happy For once. You feel it each passing day, it closes in tighter. It's the lump in your throat, the grind of your teeth. It clenches at your chest. I feel it in my lungs, and I know you feel it too. Let it in, let me leave. Please just let me leave. Please just let me leave.
3.
Quiet calm, the hospital room where his father laid quite calm, where the sound of the machines that were keeping him corporeal. When the casket would not give back his soul. It was more than he could bear. I will give you rest in me. Tear from you your woes, swallow your bad chemicals. He will never see another sun set, so help me. I will replace the sun with my scorn; I will drown our guilt, I will bury our burdens, so you will never know what it feels like to suffer alone. But for all my promises, he is still gone, and I've done nothing to bring him back safe.
4.
Pride 03:36
Oh, shut your eyes. I can't let it end like this. Five years now underground, covered, buried. Let the sun see what damage I've done. Let him learn what a man is capable of. Let him taste my pride, because I have not forgotten. It was her ghost I feared, what it might do. I buried it months ago; I was alone as I'd ever be. The night crept in; the flames went out. I could have touched your fears. The soil rose up from beneath the grass and spoke, Son, I made you what you are today. Your bones were fashioned from my form, and to me they will return. I gave you that pride. It was my hand guiding your tongue when it formed every word.
5.
I am beginning to see I am aware of the stones in my chest. I can only own up to my fears I am watching her move west (I'm still afraid) I am burning it off of me I am ripping it out through my flesh I can feel the toll of the past year I am just trying to find some rest
6.
Oh, my bluebird, the sky is so bright tonight. If I could, I would bid the moon bare you its heart. Red and pumping, in it you would see the tides and breathe in the ocean's truth. Oh, my bluebird, the sky is so bright tonight. Even the trees sway to the beat of our hearts. Blue and vibrant, the night reminds me of how your touch felt against my tepid skin. Oh my bluebird, the sky is slowly fading. I tried to stay calm long enough to feel your body leave. But, I failed I felt my color turn and flee. It's nights like these I can feel my soul on my fingertips and the blood in my veins, it burns. I lost the line in the dark of my empty room.
7.
Statues 03:06
It struck me like a church with a neon sign or a sepulcher with a welcome mat. The statue has fallen deaf again, with his prophecy left unfulfilled. He slept out the storm while we found comfort in our own warmth. Somehow we just wanted to know, but in the end, they were all just made from gold. I can't see how anyone could find sleep with this noise. The grinding hum of human indecency. It drew the line between you and me. The garden that you left was undisturbed and I am still in your debt from what I learned. I burned the bridge and I knew you weren't there. Sink into your shell, pray to God and hope he's still there. I keep talking, and I'm afraid there's nothing there to hear me.
8.
I swallowed the truth, barely kept it in my stomach. It burned and boiled inside. I wanted this, I wanted to know. I always felt you out there, quietly somewhere. Give me something, show me you meant it. But you didn't, you stayed just out of reach, called out my name as you sauntered away. I was spurned, chastised, and I could not keep up at that pace.
9.
Eurydice 06:50
Spring has withered away with the winter's last frost Leaves me with neither time nor touch to heal what I have lost I would have loved and raised our family with contentment But the gods saw fit to bear me my penance. The summer burned your frame into the skyline The only truth I needed lied twice behind your eyes But the impetuous earth stole you away from me, and I was made to see your virtuous fragility They painted to lovers close enough to touch but still in frame and never can. I balled and raised my fist and cursed the gods for everything, cursed the gods for everything they ignored. When will I forget the way your body lay limp in the dirt? When will the sound dull the pain rather than sharpen the hurt? I was alone when they sent your body out to sea. I felt your body burn as the water swallowed every last piece of me. [Break] So, I forced his hand, sang songs of terror in me and loss of my own I didn't come this far just to leave here without my home. I faced the pride that swelled within me and resolved to make him give you back then I found your body under the world, it was lost in abyss and faded cracks I touched your hand and smiled in relief that I would have you again and be spared my grief but the thought to look, and the fear that I had been deceived was more clever than I, and the urge to see you overcame me. I saw you dragged back into the earth and darkness underneath. [Break] Be still, insides, there must be another way, there must be Another sonnet, another shrill plea to tempt the fates to flee But the rivers screams how we failed, and there is no hope for return but anger, or was it grief, rooted me to the shore, a stone facet undiscerned. Autumn whispered in my ear, it sounded like your voice and when I'm honest, staying here was not a choice I'm still struggling to find the meaning of it all, when everything leads to such a tasteless curtain call.
10.
Pithy 03:12
I'm a man torn between the tragedy of wonder and the gravity of never knowing I'm counting between the lightning and thunder to see if the storm is coming or going If I cannot find words to bring you rest and strength in what's been done Bury my bones with birds and those who challenge the sun.

credits

released September 24, 2013

Recorded, Produced, and Mixed by Chuck Parson
Mastered By Carl Saff
Additional Guitar on "Patterns On The Ceiling" and "Eurydice" by Travis Kaney
Album Artwork by Brandon Highland

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Mariner St. Louis, Missouri

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